As the weather warms, many feel inclined to show more skin. While I can abide with shoulders, legs, and midriffs, it is the dogs where I draw the line. Why yes, it is an issue of absolute social anarchy. What’s worse is that yesterday was No Socks Day—can you believe it? Our society is only egging on this utter disgrace. It is time for me to speak out in hopes of correcting this egregious wrong. 

Historically, our feet have always been one of the most protected aspects of our bodies. We not only shelter them with socks but also with shoes. But nowadays, people have not upheld these sacred values. The youth are revealing their feet without any prior thought. They flash their money makers out into the world despite getting anything in return. At the very least, if you insist on unmasking your little piggies, do so in a profitable environment. 

There are resources out there in which one can display their little dogs in peace and prosperity. And yet, I see fools unleash their hooves without charging a price. And thus, it ruins an entire industry. By recklessly uncaging their dogs, these foolish people are stealing the livelihoods of so many. And so, it is simply best to keep them contained.

Besides, think of how fun it is to dress up your dogs—to find the funkiest socks, the freshest closed-toe shoes. As long as they are concealed, feel free to express yourself through your piggy’s clothing in whatever ways you see fit. Be proper, ladies and gentlemen, and society will thank you.